Cimmerians in Cinema - Part I

Between the time when the oceans drank Atlantis and the rise of the sons of Aryas, there was an age undreamed of. And unto this, Conan, destined to wear the jeweled crown of Aquilonia upon a troubled brow. It is I, his chronicler, who alone can tell thee of his saga. Let me tell you of the days of high adventure!

N-Spiration: Conan the Barbarian (1982)

About the Film

While there have been many iterations of Robert E. Howard's Conan in visual media, as might be inferred from the title, this film - starring James Earl Jones, Sandahl Bergman, Arnold Schwarzenegger as the title character, and many others. The project was a full decade in the making - having to overcome lawsuits over who owned the rights to the Conan character (not yet in the public domain, Howard's death having been only 40 years prior) as well as a relocation of the entire filming production from Yugoslavia to Spain due to the instability following the death of communist revolutionary turned legendary dictator, Tito. However - these investments would pay off in both the box office, where the film would earn almost quadruple its $20 million budget, and in cinematic history: inspiring a sequel, spin offs, and emboldening other, similar epics over the coming decade. And while criticism of the film was mixed on and following its release, it will be self evident to any OSR player or referee as to why.

The film is beautiful. Literally.

With production headquartered just outside of Madrid, the film was shot in a myriad of locations around Spain (coincidentally the inspiration for Howard's Zingara) - making great use of extensive sets and practical effects to create a combined perspective both historical and fantastic. In particular, the Temple of Set where our primary antagonist, Thulsa Doom, resides represented a $350,000 investment (around $1.2 million in 2023 currency): standing as a 70+ foot tall monument to the dedication of the film makers. Pooled blood for post battle sequences was sourced from local slaughterhouses. Further - while agencies were contacted for optical effects - including George Lucas' Industrial Light & Magic - the use of optical effects was limited (director John Milius wanting to emphasize the rugged self-reliance of the primary characters, a spirit akin to Howard's Conan in regards to the Hyborean gods). To showcase, in a scene where Doom transforms himself into a serpent - unquestionably a supernatural, fantasy element - a contrast to the grit aforementioned as the director's preference - was filmed and combined through four separate sequences: the actor, Jones, sitting; a prosthetic rubber face distending via a snake-shaped puppet pressing from behind, a man-sized mechanical snake slithering out from a cast of Doom's robes, and finally a miniature scale model of the throne set where a live snake matching its mechanized counterpart. The inclusion of practical effects, the refusal to accept painted backdrops in lieu of outdoor sets, and the attention to detail in props and mechanisms creates a truly surreal experience: one in which the near past might be realized - as though the story of Hyborea might truly slither its own way, as a priest of Set, into the annals of history.

Shot on location in Alcazaba of Almería

To compliment the compelling visual esthetic, an amazing musical score accompanies the film, with its composer, Basil Poledouris, allegedly treating the film as an opera - where the music and the atmosphere it helped create played an equal or perhaps greater role than the dialog - working closely with the director throughout production to ensure that the sound, with its raw brass and relentless percussion, inspired a sense of energy, of power: bringing the primal emotions of the viewer into the primal world of Hyborea long past. While the film was shunned by institutional accolades and awards - if it deserved one at all, it would have been for the masterful integration of sight, sound, and rhythm.

Why Conan the Barbarian?

As C.S. Lewis said in On Science Fiction, "To tell how odd things struck odd people is to have an oddity too much." 1982's Conan the Barbarian strikes this balance perfectly. In his effort to portray a world where people get by on their own strength, Milius eschewed excessive magic - and while there is magic, it does not eclipse the need for and use of mundane processes or people.

How is that OSR? It is correct to say that magic is intrinsically everywhere in an OSR game - because you can roll up a level 1 MU or accompany a level 2 Cleric essentially at the drop of a hat, this implies there is a deal of wonder to the game world. However - consider the resources available to a level 1 MU or a level 2 Cleric: by the book, in most OSR and original systems, that MU is going to have one spell at his disposal; that Cleric, one miracle granted by his divine patron. Akiro, wizard of the mounds (played by Mako) is able to convince the spirits to resurrect a dead Conan: an act anyone would deem supernatural - however that is essentially the only magic you see him doing in the film. Thulsa Doom is able to transform into a snake - as described earlier - and is able to command obeisance and compliance in a manner akin to hypnosis: but even he is able to use his powers only so many times, relying on the sword where magic might have offered the solution in a more high-fantasy picture. Thus - by allowing for magic (aforementioned magic, trinkets in the bazaar, the witch in the woods...) - but by balancing it with focus elsewhere, Conan the Barbarian presents a very OSR picture of the world: where magic can be a solution - and when it occurs, it is frequently an "I Win" button - however it is a limited resource: and steel is never obsolete. 

Further - Conan the Barbarian presents multiple dungeon crawls: reliant on strength of arms, subterfuge, as well as diplomacy to achieve successful ends. To illustrate the point while maintaining a semblance of restraint as to word count, we can examine the raid on the Tower of Set outside Zamora. During this dungeon crawl alone we see several key tenants of the OSR experience:

1. Conan and Subotai meet Valeria outside the tower - where she likewise plans to burgle. This can serve two purposes: if she is an NPC wandering monster, this represents a favorable reaction roll: one resulting in collaboration with the monster; alternatively, if she is a PC, her player may have missed the first few sessions - the witch, the tomb of the Atlantean sword, ... - and is being introduced mid-adventure.
   
   
2. In penetrating the tower, Valeria obtains a disguise, posing as one of the acolytes of Set. This is an example of subterfuge - of non-combat player solutions - to get closer to the prize. Valeria knows she is outnumbered by the guards and may be outmatched by the axe-wielding temple priest, Rexor. She chooses not to test herself, avoiding confrontation through subterfuge: a classic player tactic.
   
   
3. In the bowels of the temple, Conan and Subotai, in search for the prize of the temple - a large gemstone we come to know as the Eye of the Serpent - encounter a colossal snake: a full yard in girth and dozens of feet long, coiling around the gem's resting place. Awakening it by accident and doing battle with it - we see several concepts in motion: did Conan fail his Move Silently roll? Did the snake roll a Surprise check and pass, despite its slumber? Chaos ensues and the battle is won - but then a falling sacrifice from above alerts others in the temple to the event! This illustrates - one - that the temple is multi-level: some more dangerous than others, some containing treasure and others bereft - as well as demonstrating verticality: shafts, stairs, and other mechanisms to interconnect and allow for interaction between these levels.
   

In a sense, the scene in the Tower of Set is almost a perfect picture of an OSR dungeon crawl: the only thing missing is a fortunate Magic User dropping the Sleep spell as a mechanism to escape!

Other dungeon crawl elements can be identified - for example, Conan's acquisition of the Atlantean Sword from a barrow tomb - but the final point I will highlight as to why Conan the Barbarian will do your game good: the vincibility of characters. As mentioned above - there is a point at which Conan dies. As not yet mentioned, there is likewise a point where Valeria dies. Casualties are a part of a rogues' life - something Valeria alludes to, as though it is common knowledge among reavers and thieves: a merry life, but short, when attempting to convince Conan to give up his quest for revenge. This is something both referenced by the characters and illustrated by the film: mirroring the experience a low level party (or a higher level party with appropriate challenges) might likewise expect to encounter.

But is it Conan?

There is always an elephant in the room (or its tower, perhaps, based on context) whenever talking about Conan the Barbarian: and that is the question of its fidelity to the source material. In the Howard stories, Conan has black hair, cropped; in the Milius film, he has flowing brown. Howard's Conan is described as both intelligent and clever; many complain that Milius' Conan fails to demonstrate this quickness fairly. While some of these differences are more superficial than others, undeniably - they arise: influencing the authenticity of the film. 

Conan the Barbarian is not a Conan film, but it is a Howard film. Tributes to Howard and to Hyborea are made throughout - subtle and unsubtle - to reinforce its alternative fantasy history. Conan's first opponent when fighting in the pits of the gladiators is a man whose teeth have been filed to points: a reference to the cannibal inhabitants of Shadows in Zamboula (VERIFY). Conan's crucifixion after having been captured by Thulsa Doom? Homage to Conan's crucifixion following his capture by Constantius the Koth in A Witch Shall Be Born. Yet... Conan's comrade and paramour in the film - Valeria - while named after a warrior woman after whom Conan lusts in Red Nails, behaves more akin to Bêlit from Queen of the Black Coast: namely, in her romantic arc with Conan, her death and cremation-style funeral, as well as her brief return from death to fight by Conan's side in an hour of need. Further Bêlit contribution to the film - in Milius' Conan, an ally - Subotai (whose name has no Howard parallel, but whose character and culture may be based from the Hyrkanians of Iron Shadows and The Devil in Iron) discuss religion: in Queen of the Black Coast, this is Bêlit's honor. 

Similarly - the primary antagonist of the film, Thulsa Doom - from where does he hail? Are not the main sorcerous adversaries to Conan Xaltotun (The Hour of the Dragon) or perhaps Thoth Amon (The Phoenix on the Sword)? Thulsa Doom hails from a posthumous Howard publication - The Cat and the Skull - originally presented in the King Kull compilation by Lancer Books. Kull - as a character - is similar to Conan: an outsider, a barbarian, who takes a throne by force and skill - an earlier character which did not catch on as did Conan. These would not be the only contributions Kull made to Milius' Conan the Barbarian - Howard's Conan has no tragic background, where Howard's Kull is from a tribe destroyed when he was a child: Milius' Conan, post orphaning, becomes a slave whose physical labors cause him to develop great strength; Howard's Kull is captured and enslaved as a youth by Lemurian pirates, where he builds great strength as a galley slave. Milius' Conan learns to fight in the gladiatorial arena; Howard's Kull - though having been a pirate and warrior before - is captured in Valusia and fights in the gladiatorial arena.

Is Milius' Conan the Barbarian then a retelling of Kull? Aptly - the original script for 1997's Kull the Conqueror starring Kevin Sorbo was originally intended to be a Conan film to follow 1984's Conan the Destroyer, but had gotten hung up in developmental snags. That said - I would argue no. While no Howard scholar, but a Howard fan, Conan the Barbarian appears to have been written by a Howard fan - one who took Howardian elements from across the board, tossed them into a mixer, and added some of his own spices to the recipe: producing an adaptation, an interpretation of the work and of the character that was his own. Whether that is fair or not? A moot point - posthumously, more Conan has been written than ever was written by the original author. Whether it is faithful or not? Subjective - to the taste of the viewer. Someone who is passionate about Howard may find the liberties Conan the Barbarian takes to be distressing - though someone who has no experience with Howard prior may find it a gateway: rediscovering the pulp classics for themselves after having been snared by the allure of the film's powerful character and story. 

The latter example is my own story - I find Howard's original works refreshing, electric: but for those memories, for that introduction - perhaps - I still have a soft spot for the 1982 cinematic adaptation. Whether or not that spot is soft, hard, or spiny for you will have to wait to be determined until you see it.

Conclusion

Conan the Barbarian may not be a perfect film - nor can any film truly encapsulate the experience of adventure around the table when playing your choice of fantasy adventure game - however Conan is, for the latter purpose, one of the gleaming examples of how close it can truly come. Not, perhaps, as inspirational as reading the original Howard texts - enshrined boldly and proudly in ubiquity in Gary's 1979 Appendix N - but doubtless and verily a resource in its own right: to inspire your games, to inspire your players, and to inspire your game. In honor of this, the Garimeter reading for Conan the Barbarian, 1982, plants itself loosely on the 1.

Howard's Conan, this film is not - but taken in context of its own merits, watched free from inhibitions of the genre, it stands head and shoulders above other similar films of the era: with its memorable characters, its amazing production, and the resonating impression it continues to make through to this day on home campaigns all over.

Thank you for reading. Delve on!

 

Conan the Barbarian (1982) is copyright Universal Pictures. Illustration of Conan from The Coming of Conan the Cimmerian by Mark Schultz, published by Del Ray Books and copyright Conan Properties International, LLC. Advanced Dungeons & Dragons, Dungeons & Dragons, and D&D and all imagery thereto related are property of Wizards of the Coast. All rights reserved to and by the respective owner parties.

Clerics Wear Ringmail makes no claim of ownership of any sort to any of the aforementioned media, texts, or images and includes references to them for review purposes under Fair Use: US Code Title 17, Chapter 107.

The slide-in of Gary... I got from a meme.